Now I’ve repeated the word ho three times there because I want you to listen to this with the spirit of Christmas in your hearts.

Not everybody does you know.

I’ve been alerted to the fact that one of Santa’s helpers down in Australia has been fired for saying “ho-ho-ho.”  Evidently some Grinch of an employer had given strict instructions that all of Santa’s helpers were to say “ha-ha-ha.”  They wanted the real jolly old elf to mark them down on his list as being nice not naughty.  Their concern was that the word ho has in certain circles come to be an alternative way of saying “whore.”

And that’s definitely naughty!

I have personal knowledge that Santa Claus is a big fan of dictionaries and so to find out what his reaction might be to this firing I decided to consult my dictionaries.

It could be that the guys who fired Santa’s helper were being nice by keeping this word from being uttered, but then again, it could be that Santa would scribble them down on the naughty side of the ledger.  Firing someone just before Christmas can’t be too nice I don’t think.

Looking in the Oxford English Dictionary I do see some support for the firing.  In 1964 and ’65 I see the first citations for ho meaning “sexually promiscuous woman” or “prostitute.”

Urbandictionary definitely backs that up with thousands of votes.  Most Urbandictionary entries have tens or maybe hundreds of votes.

Things are looking pretty bad for that Australian Santa because the OED tells me that in 1890 an Englishman recorded the fact that one African tribe referred to another tribe as ho, which was effectively calling them “a heap of dried peas.”

Even more damning the OED says that for more than 500 years ho-ho-ho has been an expression of derision or derisive laughter.  There’s even a 900 year old Latin quote.

Do you suppose that mean Santa’s helper was actually making fun of the little kids who came to see him?

Even worse is this quote from 1575:

Did not the devil cry ho ho ho?

Maybe that fake Santa shouldn’t have just been fired, maybe he should have been ridden out of town on a rail!

But wait a minute.  Let’s try to regain the spirit of the season.

I see as the last line in many of the news articles that although the department store Santa guy said he was fired for saying”ho-ho-ho”, the store themselves deny it.  They say ho-ho-ho is okay.

What’s going on here?  Doesn’t that store sell dictionaries?

Let me have another look.  Here in the American Heritage Dictionary ho is defined as “used to express surprise or joy.”

That warms my heart a little more.  Here too in Urbandictionary there are a few sweet entries among the naughty:

• Santa Claus’s most famous line that he uses as a greeting and exclamation.
• Can be used to describe how some people laugh i.e. very jolly and old-fashioned sounding.

Looking again at the OED I see the etymology of ho reads

A natural expression…

Enjoy the season!